were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Randomize
