dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
