all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize
