My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize
