she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Where is the hickey?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
It's blow job season.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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