I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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