Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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