I don't think brook has ever known best
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
