im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize