ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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