he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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