In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
