i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
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