the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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