I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
