Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Randomize
