one two three fourrrrnication!
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Enjoy the penises
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
