I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
