Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
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