He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
