No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
