are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
