maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Randomize
