I got chris browned last night
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
