i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
