Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
