Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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