Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
