How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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