Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
