either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
