Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
