well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
