Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I just pynch a tree in the face
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
