the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
