Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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