So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
