THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
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