So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
