So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
where am i from again
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
