Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize