Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
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