she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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