Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
