Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize