i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I smell stomach acid.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
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