New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
