yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
