oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
