I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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